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How Willow Smith has been whipping up the charts

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Famous family: Willow’s parents are movie stars Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith and her brother Jaden, far left, starred in the remake of The Karate Kid released earlier this year

She looks like a pocket-sized version of pop star of the moment Rihanna, yet it’s not just her edgy choice of clothes, but also her swagger and attitude that’s very apparent in the slickly choreographed video for her single, Whip My Hair.

‘I get my flow from Daddy, my singing ability from Mommy, and the camera stuff from both,’ she explains with terrifying self-assurance, before going on to say that she ‘gets how celebrity works’ and wants to be bigger than Lady Gaga.

When you’ve got this much front at ten, where do you go next?

Matt Cardle is crowned winner of the X Factor

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Winner: Matt Cardle has been crowned the X Factor 2010 champion in a closely fought contest which saw Rebecca Ferguson come in second place followed by One Direction

 

Accepting her defeat graciously, Rebecca said: ‘I’m so happy, so grateful and Matt’s amazing. I’m just so happy to have got this far.

 

Sarah Ndagire Extends Helping Hand To The Needy

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Local artiste Sarah Ndagire and friends are planning a charity benefit for the less able of the society. They are appealing to all well-wishers to donate clothes, soap, salt or anything to this worthy cause. There will be a benefit concert on Wednesday 1st Dec at Club Obbligato Little Flowers and all proceeds will go to Gaita kukibi widows and elderly network. Entrance is 20k, if you are unable to attend simply send in your donation by http://sarahndagire.com/concertposter.html

Alternatively, call 0772595639/0701595639 for pick of any material support e.g sugar, clothes, soap etc if you are in Kampala

Tickets are on sale right now at club obligato, Alliance Francaise, National theater box office, or can be delivered by calling 0772595639/0701595639

 

Paddy Dee for the first UK unplugged

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Above Paddy dee performing in Brussels and all ladies wowed

As far as hardworking musicians go, Paddy Dee should be ranked number one in the entire United Kingdom.

Our Paps have learnt that just a few days after his riveting Brussels performance, Paddy Dee is getting ready for another show in London. Those who have watched the rehearsals say that the show is guaranteed to go down in history as the most energetic and entertaining show by a UK based Ugandan artiste.

In keeping with the energy of the show, Paddy Dee has invited all the big Uk stars to perform at his 3rd Dec show which will be held at Club Volts in London. Mark this date in your calendar and get ready to be wowed.

Nicki Minaj Celebrates Her 26th Birthday

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Nicki Minaj dropped into TAO in Vegas to celebrate her 26th Birthday. Pink Friday’s finest was not alone her guest included a sober Lil Wayne, Mack Maine, Birdman, Amber Rose, and Cassie among others last night. Peep a few shots from last nights festivities. Young Money parties look pretty interesting. Real question is Nicki, Amber or Cassie?

Above Nicki, Amber and Cassie

 

Batabazi a Ugandan force in Boston

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You’ve probably heard their music on the radio and wondered who the extremely talented voices belong to. They have done collaborations with most of Uganda’s major stars including Jackie of Blu3, Navio, Rabadaba and Ragga Dee. Exposed Uganda now proudly gives you the complete profile of the five talented artistes.

The group is called Batabazi and started making music in 2007 in Boston, Massachusetts, USA. The name Batabazi was chosen because the members wanted something that symbolize who they are as individuals, the movement they stand for as a whole and appeal to both the Ugandan and non-Ugandan crowd. The word “Batabazi” is a Luganda word from the phrase “okutabaala” which means to wander or move from place to place.  Batabazi is comprised of five individuals, PG, Jerome Black, Tasha, Gera and Mayor. PG, Jerome Black, Tasha and Gera are the performers who sing and rap and Mayor is the producer in the group. Batabazi’s roots are hip hop but are very versatile given the dynamics of the group and have recently done music in R&B and Reggae They are managed by BaSe Entertainment who are also based in Boston and they are promoted by in Africa by Talent256. They are currently working on a full Album, however before that they will be releasing a 6-track EP called “Set it Off” in December 2010 in Uganda.

Recent & upcoming projects:

* Dirty Shame featuring Jackie Chandiru of Blu3

* Uganda Nka Remix featuring Rabadaba, Navio & Ragga Dee

* Sweep – (Ragga Dee’s track that Batabazi featured on)

* Buuka – video is coming up soon

* Set it Off – video is coming up soon

* Recorded songs at Swangz Avenue & Goodenuff Studios recently

* Involved in charity, Kigalama Children’s Initiative in Mityana –   collecting money to build water cisterns to provide clean water to families in Kigalama. Recently held a charity concert that raised enough money to build three water cisterns

* Recently returned from a tour in Uganda. They performed in  Kampala and Jinja and will be returning in December for another tour that will have them go as far as Arua for performances

* Will be releasing their 6-track EP – “Set it Off” in December

 

Meet Joe Street

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Above Myco Chris and Jostreet on their video set

 

Joe Street aka Joshua Kizito born in Kampala Uganda now a UK based artiste is a fresh and amazing talent on the horizons lately. Joe Street started singing at a very early age playing as many an instrument as he could get to he’s hands. Many might know him as the guy behind the popular song Okwagala where he features Myco Chris.

Joe Street left Uganda for the UK in 2000 for his university studies at New Castle college where he studied Cisco networking, later on joining Thames Valley university studying airline and airport management specializing in air flight control. Being the talent he is Joe hooked up with a few producers in London recording songs as Okwagala, Omubiri, and many more.

Joe Street joined Myco Chris in 2009 at Myco Chris Records London and since then he has become a force to reckon with in the industry more so that of the United Kingdom.  Having performed on a number of events in the United Kingdom and elsewhere in the world, Joe is set to tour the world promoting he’s fourth coming Album.

For many it might be a dream but Joe is living the dream at the moment as he looks back on how it has been such a long journey to where he is at the moment. Having been an MC in many of the clubs in London of which include club Liquid, Joe feels it is time to out the box and bring something to the table of the great world of music.

Joe wants to thank all the lovely people for the support they have given and he promises to keep his fans blessed with music from the soul. In the words of Joe Street, “The world we live in now needs more than just beats but value crafted in words, rhythm and melody.” Expect alot from this talented young man.

 

The Network

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The Hitchhiker

He was hanging up the phone as J walked up to him. He stood up, widening his arms to welcome her in a hug; all one long, fluid, tall sentence;
“What’s up?”and a kiss planted on my cheek as a full-stop.
“I’m ok. How are you?”Her response drowned in the thick cotton of his dark blue hood.
“What?” he asked, as they extricated themselves awkwardly. J got a chance to repeat herself. “Where have you been hiding?”
“Me, hiding? You’re the one who said you’d call me.” This was true, he had promised he would call her, that night she let him do everything but fuck her in his friend’s car in the parking lot of —————. Kevo intended to blame it on J nonetheless.

The reason he had not called her was that his girlfriend Penny, had found a braid on his bathroom floor while cleaning on Monday morning. Kevo had spent most of Monday trying to convince Penny it belonged to the maid/his cousin Beatrice/the madwoman in Nakawa market who pretends to play a guitar covered in Samona stickers.

Tuesday morning he admitted he had slept with his ex – Sharon. The next two days he spent sending texts and listening to the Warid lady say “the number you have dialled does not answer,” in her frightfully fucking cheery voice. Friday he bought flowers and chocolates, apologised profusely and even managed to squeeze out some tears. At the weekend he had dropped 500 000shs on a ridiculously large red leather bag and took her to The Lawns and watched her open his gift, squealing more enthusiastically than she would when they had make-up sex later that night. So he hadn’t had much time to call J, though he had indeed promised he would.

Meanwhile, J hadn’t really been expecting him to call when she had climbed out of the steamy car the Saturday before. She had wiped her thighs in the bathroom and gone back to the table where her boyfriend Philo was sitting with her friend Alice.

“Sorry, my dad called, had to find somewhere quiet. I hope Alice was keeping you entertained.”
“She did,” Philo smiled, as he leaned onto the back legs of his plastic white chair and took a swig of his Club. “She was telling me how one of her friends pretends to drop a braid in guy’s homes for the wife to find.” He made annoying air quotes around the word pretend.
“No! Alice, who does that? You are lying.”

“I swear! My friend was telling me she did it to her ex-boyfriend just last week.”
“Oh God, Alice, your friends!” They all laughed, J a little louder, stopping sooner and a bit more abruptly than the other two. She wiped some sweat from her brow and beamed at Philo as though a halo had suddenly sprung up around his head, with a choir of melismatic Beyoncés dancing around it.

That night J had thrown herself into pleasing Philo with the zeal only expressed by the guilty. She didn’t even think to be suspicious when he gave her an oversized pair of women’s jeans to go home in (after he had cum all over the back of her little black miniskirt). After all, Philo was so into being honest about his feelings for her, talking about how she made him want to make the leap into serious relationships, and sending her text messages about how she was “good for him”.

What J didn’t know was that the jeans belonged to a certain Sharon, who had built up such a collection of things in Philo’s little hostel room that she could afford to pick and choose which items of clothing to go home in.

But of course J was oblivious to all these comings and goings-on in the lovely city of Kampala when she hugged Kevo goodbye after their short conversation.

“Let’s leave this place, and finish what we started off last time” Kevo suggested breathily into her ear.
J shrugged. “I’m with my friends”
“Later?”
“I’ll send you a text”. And she walked away not wanting to seem too eager. Guys like him were a bit too enamoured by that kind of thing.
Kevo pulled his phone back out of his pocket and dialled.
“Hi… No baby, of course I didn’t hang up on you…come on now, why would I?…No…. It’s the network”

Leading Daily Declares War on Michael Ezra

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Michael Ezra

Michael Ezra a billionaire, freelance megalomaniac and CEO of Shady Sente Inc, one of the largest fraud conglomerates in the region recently issued a particularly rubbery cheque to National Bank Uganda. He then fled to his underwater villa at the bottom of Lake Victoria. Reports have it that he currently spends his time either contemplating his navel or offering languid middle fingers to anybody who dares to have an opinion.

This scandalous incident followed a mere week after he invited the entire national media to a press conference at Emin Pasha hotel and then publically bitch-slapped the lot with 7million dollars in cash.

That piece of back handed kiss-my-assery created a small impotence epidemic at a certain leading daily. Now following this development, the national media has taken this slip up on Michael Ezra’s part to declare war. The campaign (we are informed) has been dubbed; he is a goner like my boner.

“This is good for morale,” said a visibly excited executive at afore-suggested daily. People around the office have been bored and depressed. Solitaire can only go so far you know.
“We’ve got all sorts of ammo piled up.” Said Mr. Simira Shya!, head of the Take Down Michael Ezra Task Force (TADOMETS for short). “For instance we have a former butler who will testify that Michael Ezra is actually a pussy who listens to Dolly Parton, watches The Notebook at least twice a month and uses apple scented lotion; we have all kinds of dirt. This guy is a goner.”

TADOMETS has also recruited an army of twelve of the most recognized layer hens in Kampala. These hens are liberating eggs around the clock to fill up the quota of trays required before the villa under the lake can be stormed.

“We don’t know those things of Interpol, we leave that to police, for us we bewitch. It is all part of our bid to support local talent and enterprise, Corporate Social Responsibility if you will.” explained Mr. Simira.

Wamma What Did The President Tell Kipsiro?

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Kipsiro on Phone

Moses Kipsiro. You know him? The Ugandan who beat three Kenyans and some other insignificant dudes at running in circles up to a certain string? In Uganda, it’s in our blood to keep running from the police. I don’t know how they expected to beat Moses (Yeah, I call him by his first name. I be close to him like that).

So our President, Mr. Museveni was watching La Tormenta one night when someone called from the kitchen: “President of Uganda, first change back to the other station. Kipsiro has won something.” Irritated that someone was getting his attention off his favourite programme, he shouted back, “Is he in NRM?” After getting a “Yes”, he gladly switched to the Commonwealth Games in India.

And that’s how he got to know about the boy’s first victory. Other media organizations just told you that Museveni called Kipsiro but ULK ran ahead. We tapped their call. You remember the person calling from the kitchen? Yes, that was a ULK reporter disguised as a human being and this is what he/she/it came back with:

Kips hollas at Sevs

Kip: Hello?

M7: Hello? Kipsiro! Do you have a…

Kip: Hello?

M7: Yes. Hello. You can’t here me?

Kip: Hellooo!

M7: [These FDC phones!] Can you here me now?

Kip: Yes I can. Who is this?

M7: President Museveni.

Kip: Who?

M7: Museveni. Yoweri.

Kip: Who?!

M7: Fourth term.

Kip: Oh! President Museveni! Wow, it’s a privilege to hear from you, sir.

M7: Me also, me also. I was asking, do you have a computer near you?

Kip: No sir. But there’s an internet café I can run to a few miles from here. Okay, I’m in the café.

M7: Good. Accept my friend request on Facebook. It’s an honour to know a celeb.

Kip: No sir, the honour is mine. I’m very privileged to talk to you, sir.

M7: No, the honour is mine.

Kip: That’s very flattering, sir but the honour is actually m…

M7: Are you arguing?

Kip: No sir. You own the honour.

M7: Have you accepted my request?

Kip: Yes sir.

M7: Lol. Your profile pic looks funny.

Kip: Lmao.

M7: So what do you do?

Kip: I, er, run.

M7: Does it benefit Movement in any way?

Kip: Er, well, running involves movement so I think…

M7: NRM. Does it benefit NRM?

Kip: No sir. Not really.

M7: Oh.

Kip:

M7:

Kip: But it benefits Uganda. It gives the country positive publicity.

M7: Okay. Anyway, I’ll have to appear in public with you, shake hands, give a speech…you know how these things be.

Kip: I understand, sir. How about the others?

M7: What others?

Kip: There are other Ugandan sportsmen who were sent here with me.

M7: To do what?

Kip: To compete in the Commonwealth Games. Just like me.

M7: Are they all Kipsiros?

Kip: No sir.

M7: For now, I’m dealing with Kipsiros only. So when you arrive, I’ll give you some pocket money and make a promise to maybe construct something big in your honour, which I won’t keep, of course. Time will pass and people will forget.

Kip: It’s totally fine, sir.

M7: Personally, I would have loved to keep the promises but…blame it on the government; them and their big stomachs.

Kip: It’s okay, Mr. President.

M7: Okay. I’m running out of airtime but we’ll…

Kip: You’re a runner too?!

M7: No… [This call will de disconnected shortly!] …I meant the credit on my ph…

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